A new year.

A very different year for me.

I guess I’d call it the “New Year’s blues”, that moment where you start reflecting on everything that’s happened over the past year, or even longer.

The biggest thing I accomplished this year was graduating university with a First Class Honours. I don’t think I ever expected to finish with such a high grade, especially when I struggled so much at school. I genuinely didn’t think university was even an option for me. No matter how hard I tried, school just never felt like it was made for me.

And honestly, most people from my school would probably agree.

Realising that I’ve actually gone further than some people who were always seen as “destined” for success reminds me why I pushed myself so hard. Part of it was proving others wrong, but more importantly, I proved myself wrong. I can do it. My future is there, it’s just taking a little longer than I thought.

And alongside that came my creative practice.

My final year at uni definitely wasn’t the easiest, and now I can see why, but I don’t want to dwell on that anymore. Those things aren’t my problem now. Because of it all, I pushed my work harder and created outcomes I’m genuinely proud of. One project in particular made me a finalist in a competition, which meant I was able to visit London for the first time to see my work exhibited. Even though it was during the hottest days of the year, it was an incredible experience and one I’ll never forget.

When it came to graduating, I saw how much others struggled with job applications and the constant “lack of experience” issue. Being slightly older than most of my coursemates, I knew I needed to gain as many skills and as much experience as possible while I was studying. I really did try my best, but unfortunately, at this stage in my career, it still wasn’t enough.

It’s a difficult one. I’m sure so many of us can talk about the same thing: how are we meant to get experience if no one gives us a chance? But at the same time, we can’t be hired because we don’t have it. It’s a vicious circle.

Which brings me to where I am now, working with a new start-up brand, doing an art direction internship remotely in a hybrid role. It’s very different to what I imagined, and there are days where I feel uncertain. But that’s just because it’s new, and like most people, new things scare me. That’s natural.

What matters is that I don’t give up.

I’m hoping to keep that attitude going, to continue learning about the fashion industry, not just the creative side, but the business side too. I want to be the best person I can be, and for me that means always learning.

Freelancing…

This is probably one of the biggest and most uncertain things I’ve ever done.

I never planned to go freelance. I never wanted to start my own business. I always imagined myself working for a company, alongside other creatives, following briefs, with a steady income. But with the way job opportunities are right now, that just isn’t an option for me.

Being constantly told I lacked experience made me question how else I could gain it, especially with no connections in the fashion world and living so far from where everything happens. Moving to London isn’t realistic for me financially. So I knew I had to do something myself.

That something was freelancing.

I avoided it for weeks, but ultimately realised I had to try before giving up and settling for a job I hadn’t worked my ass off for over the past five years. So that’s what I did. On 23rd September 2025, I officially announced that I was going freelance.

I went into it completely blind.

I was still stuck in the mindset of hating the idea of freelancing, which obviously didn’t help. I wasn’t expecting to start straight away, and part of me hoped I wouldn’t. I was unprepared. No business cards. My website and social media were still designed purely for university projects. Nothing about me was ready for the freelance world.

Then I did a 10-week employability course, which taught me so much and forced me to focus on my business. I’d be lying if I said I’m 100% ready now, I’m still figuring things out, sorting my website, learning as I go. But I’m incredibly grateful for those I’ve worked with so far, and for everyone who’s reached out to work with me.

I don’t hate freelancing.

I’m just uncomfortable.

Again, it’s the new that scares me.

Once things like the university workroom are sorted and I can access studios and equipment, I know I can really start building my business, helping others through creative direction, e-commerce photography, portraits, editorial work, and more. Right now, the workroom situation is probably my biggest stress, but I hope not for much longer.

There’s also the loneliness that comes with freelancing. There’s no one to tell you how to do things. You are everything: social media manager, editor, graphic designer, admin, photographer, videographer… it’s a lot. I can’t afford to build a team yet, which is something I really miss and value.

I’m very open to working within creative teams, bringing people on board, or offering experience to those who need it. Helping others is just part of who I am. I’d love to build something collaborative, especially because fashion photography in the South West isn’t as established as other creative industries. But I do think there’s an opportunity here, and I’d love to help put Plymouth on the fashion map alongside other creatives.

Maybe someone will read this and take the idea.

Maybe someone will read it and reach out.

It’s a long shot, but I’m hopeful.

Going into 2026, I’ve thought a lot about what I want. While juggling three jobs, it’s hard to put it all into words. More than anything, I hope for health and happiness this year, especially after starting it with a chest infection since New Year’s Eve (very on brand).

And I hope to be successful. In whatever I do.

My goals for 2026:

• Work with new clients

• Join AUP’s workroom or find a studio in Plymouth

• Do my own creative projects

• Enter competitions

• Visit London again

• Travel more — solo, spontaneous trips, anything

• Buy a desk for home (my bed is not a desk)

• Do big editorial shoots — location and studio

• Open up assisting opportunities for others

• Post more on social media without overthinking

• Blog more — writing is easier than talking

• Be more creative with my work

• Collaborate more

• Join a freelance group (if that exists?)

• Keep my bedroom tidy

• Send my work to magazines

• Try product photography — step outside my comfort zone

• Build creative teams and make something new

• Meet more freelancers and creatives in Plymouth

• Assist others to gain experience

• Make more time for friends

• Enjoy weekends more

• Stay off my phone in the evenings

• Go to the gym and stay healthy (already lost 2.5 stone since summer)

• Learn more about the fashion business

• Learn new editing styles and techniques

I have a lot of goals. I hope I achieve at least some of them — but I’m also very much a go-with-the-flow person.

More than anything, I just hope this year is kind to me.

That it brings growth, opportunities, and good energy.

I’m manifesting ✨